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That night, the president became very nervous about the bet and spent a long time in front of the mirror examining his testicles, turning them this way and that, checking them over again and again until he was positive that no one could consider his testicles as square and reassuring himself that there was no way he could lose the bet.

Paddy says to Mary if you were stranded on a desert island who would you like most to be with you? A: A cheater, cheater, woman beater.

"Thanks, Father," said the old man.

Not sure if you have noticed, but I love bad puns.

Well actually, it's more of a wrap.

He moves closer about 20 feet.

Q: Why was the African American girl quiet during the movie? After over an hour of searching, he finally gives up.

" The old fellow took a long drag on the cigar, blew a careful smoke ring and replied, "You are the sixth today, sir! Q: Why do men get their great ideas in bed? In a freak accident today, a photographer was killed when a huge lump of cheddar landed on him.

They were both stuck up bitches.

.

Peter looked up the priests and informed them there had been a mistake; they were not supposed to die for another 10 years or so.

Cheese means faster and tomato means harder, okay? You boil the hell out of it.